i stare out of the window as the snow falls, i didn’t expect a snowstorm to happen, “are you sure you’re okay?”, Olivia’s dad asks she nods, “i did blackout from that piece of hail though”. Olivia says, it turns quiet for a second, “who rescued you?” he asks with curiosity in his voice, “i saved her, my face was veiled with blood since a big piece of hail hit me”. i say, thats when i see his teary eyes in the mirror, “are you okay?” i ask him concerned, “im fine thanks for being there for my daughter” he says to me, my eyes wided. “you dont have to thank me, really its alright” i say with a smile, Olivia rests her hand on mine, “are you okay Ethan?” her dad asks me, “yeah im fine” i say with a smile i look over to her. “we’re almost at the hospital” she says, i smile “yeah we sure are, dork” i say patting her head, “i remember you use to hate me, its funny you love me now” i say laughing. she blushes, “you gotta shame me for that?” she asks, “of course your reactions are cute”, i say laughing slightly we get out and head into the hospital, me and Olivia sit down. her face has a look of worry on it, i rest my hand reassuringly on her shoulder, “it’ll be okay i promise you, nothing bad will happen” i say calmly to her, a reassuring smile spreads on my face. she then smiles and starts lighting up, “alright” she says, her dad is at the receptionist desk explaining the situation, he then comes back looking worried himself. “sir it’ll be okay i promise, nothing bad will happen to her” i say soothingly, he gives me a light smile but still, i sense remaining tension in this room, Olivia is anxiously fidgeting with her hair. im quite anxious myself, im trying to keep my composure but im struggling tremendously, in a couple of minutes there a lady comes out of a door. “Olivia” she says out loud, Olivia then gets up and walks towards her, they then disappear into a room, this.. leaves me and her dad alone, i feel awkward being alone with him. even the thought of it leaves me cringing, alone with your girlfriends dad.. yikes, i then feel a hand rest on me, “i could tell you are worried, are you alright?” he asks me. i shake my head, “if i would’ve never yelled at her, she wouldn’t have ran off she wouldn’t have gotten hurt”, i say my voice is coated in shame, i feel bad even though she has forgave me already. her dad looks at me surprised, “i know how you feel, but thats normal for friends to do and especially normal for couples, we all get into arguments”. he says reassuring me, i smile “thanks sir i appreciate it”, i say smiling at him he looks a bit surprised, “no need to be formal Ethan its okay” he says, he looks like somethings on his mind. “to ease your worries, have you noticed olivias watch?” he asks me, i nod my head at him, “well she can make calls on it, she called and said how she felt bad for making you upset”. he says smiling at me, “she was never mad at you, she wasn’t sad not even upset at you! she truly, really loves you” he says patting my back, i smile. “actually, sometimes i overhear you guys talk, it makes me happy to know you’re there for her”, he says happily it makes me slightly embarrassed, “so.. you’ve heard the serenades?”. i ask blushing awkwardly, he looks at me puzzled “no, i never heard you sing her serenades?” he asks me, my face goes bright red “i thought you knew” i say awkwardly. he laughs slightly, “thats nice” he says patting my back, i then start laughing to, “what do you sing her? those cringe boy band mush?” he asks me smiling, i laugh a bit. “yeah mostly, sometimes she plays her music, sometimes i play mine” i say, he smiles “what do you listen to?”, he asks me “rock or metal mostly”, i say he smiles at that comment. “looks like we’re similar then” he says, he then suddenly looks nervous, “so.. have you um”, he awkwardly pauses, “kissed her yet?” he says looking awkward, oh geese. thats the thing i absolutely wished he wouldn’t ask, “only two times” i say blushing, “although she has kissed me on the cheek twice” i say blushing intensely, he looks embarrassed. “when was the other?, i only saw her kiss you once” he says, dose he really have to ask this?, “in class some kids dared her to” i say, after i say it i then quickly change topics. right as im about to talk Olivia walks out, “im alright” she says smiling, we get up and walk out, we sit down in the car once the seat belts are in we start going, “so it went good?”. olivias dad asks her, “yeah it went well” she says, he then gives me a smirk in the reerview mirror, “Ethan was worried about that camp incident” he says embarrassing me. Olivia then looks at me, “really Ethan?” she asks, “yeah i felt bad about our argument” i say, she wraps her arms around me and gives me a hug, “you worry to much”. she says smiling at me, i smile back “its true though”, i say to her, she holds my hand in hers, “its okay! besides, you know you’re the one i love” she whispers to me. she then unexpectedly kisses my cheek, my eyes wided in shock, it leaves me in a happy daze, “w-woah” i say grabbing my cheek, she then giggles quietly, “you’re to adorable” she says glomping on me. i laugh while smiling, her dad just gives us a slight smile, “oh kids and their crazy romance”, he says while laughing, after a long drive we end up home. i head into my house, “little bro? are you okay?”, my sis and bro ask me, i nod “yep!, guess what happened?” i say teasingly, they turn their heads to the side, “i got a girlfriend”. i say immediately when i do they drop to the floor, “hes growing up to fast!”, they say in sync i laugh it off, “is it Olivia?” they ask i nod my head, i get a ping on my phone. “come up stairs, lets talk :)” she texted to me, i light up when i see it and dash upstairs, i run to my window and open it up, she does the same “hey Ethan” she says to me. i wave to her, “can you play your music again?”, she asks excitedly, i nod i go over to my music rack, “what do you wanna hear?” i yell to her, “godsmack!” she yells to me, i pick one of their Cd’s and pop it in. i then run over to the window, we then start dancing and singing, “believe me im bulletproof-” i then pause, i heard my door creak, i look behide me and see. my whole family standing there “guys leave”, i say embarrassed Olivia starts laughing, my face is really red, my family give us smirks and leave, “sorry about that”. i say awkwardly, Olivia smiles at me “its fine”, she says to me, “i accidentally revealed to your dad that i sing you serenades”, i say blushing, she looks at me blushing intensely. “oh gosh” she says laughing, “im excited for school”, i say happily Olivia smiles, “you’re going to school?, even after what happened?” she asks me, i nod “of course, a wound like this isn’t stopping me”. i say doing a pose, Olivia just shakes her head while laughing, “i still can’t believe Jane and Christopher got together”, i say face palming myself. she shakes her head vigorously, “they’re not gonna last long”, she responds.

shielding myself from the barren tears of winter itself, the spikes of winter tears smash into me, bruises appear wear the barren tears hit, my own tears leak down my face, the trace of sadness marks its spot. it all happened hours ago, i was talking with Ethan laughing and smiling, i asked him a certain question, it ended up with him lashing out, he yelled at me. “just shut up! please! im just sad alright?”, i didn’t know how to process that, my hearts never heard such cold, harsh words i couldn’t understand why he said that. the question i didn’t seem as hurtful, i didn’t see it as harmful in anyway, when he looked at me he seemed so hurt, lonelier then i had ever seen, tears were forming in his eyes. the next thing i know, i shift in the direction behide and run, i didn’t know when i would return, was it gonna be a hour? was it gonna be many hours?, the answer is multiple. i wanted to go back, but i couldn’t handle what Ethan might say, i was afraid of hurting his feelings, “Olivia!” he yelled, pain was melodic it was filled of pain, a painful melody was in his voice. then the next i hear is a slap, then the sound of my friend yelling, then it all turns into melodies of nature, this was my first time in a forest, i was beyond worried and terrified. but by now, it was to late to turn around, the snowy wraith of winter hit me, it was a beautiful sunny day, the next hail was pouring from the sky, the sky was crying. why though?, what upset it? was it our fight earlier?, or am i just a idiot trying to think philosophically?, im only nine its not like im gonna know everything about life. the hail smacked me in the head, the next i know im unconscious, the thought of Ethan is in my head, is he safe? i dont want him to die, the darkness is all i see, i just pray he saves me before it consumes me. the hail is coming down hard, me and Olivia had a argument over, well not really a argument, im the one who lashed out onto her, my worst fear came alive. my toxic side unleashed itself, i don’t mean to be i didn’t mean those words, they stabbed me like a rough sided dagger when i said them, my tears wanted to flow. these tears were not barren, not like those other times, this time it really pained me, Katie slapped me, the echo of it spread around, the sting spread straight into my feelings. thats when it clicked to me, the feelings damaged her the worst anyone’s damaged her, i hurt her so much, i sped up my pace, i was running so fast my head was spinning. “OLIVIA!!” i screamed, when i opened up my eyes, a giant piece of hail smashed into my face, i threw backwards it stung badly, i reached up to my face my hand was veiled in blood. it was covered in scarlet blood, i got up and ran faster then before, “OLIVIA!!” i yelled again, as i was running i halted in my steps, there Olivia was covered in snow. i picked her up, i kept running i knew i needed to find shelter, after running i found a random cabin, i ran in and locked the door, there was firewood i took some and put it in the fireplace. i took out a match from my drawstring bag, i struck the match and tossed it in, i took off my coat and covered Olivia in it, i got onto the floor and sat by her. “Olivia.. please” i say, it sounds all jumbled up when i say it, my tears are streaming out of my eyes, “huh? Ethan!” Olivia says excitedly, without hesitation i hug her quickly. im smiling so big right now, “Olivia!” i say excitedly, tears keep flowing out of my eyes. “Ethan dont cry” she says smiling at me, “i was so scared” i say trying to maintain a calm voice, Olivia’s eyes start to water, i hold her close “its okay” i whisper to her, “im just so happy i have you”. i whisper to her, i wipe her tears away, “think of the good now” i say, she smiles at my remark “okay”, she says smiling, she lifts her hand up “Ethan your face!”. she says wided her eyes, “oh let me fix it” i say, i grab my towel from my bag and hold it to my face, “Ethan im sorry about earlier” Olivia says apologetically, i shake my head. “you did nothing wrong it was me”, i say apologetically, “i.. have a bad habit of being toxic” i say, Olivia pulls me into a hug, “ill love you no matter what” she whispers to me, i smile. she then pulls away, i slip my hand in hers, then i press my lips against hers, our eyes are closed, she wraps her arms around me, she brings me closer to her, hours end up flying by. when i wake up im on the floor, “Ethan you okay?” Olivia asks me, “yeah im fine” i say, we get on our coats and pack our stuff, before we step out i grab her hand, “stay by me”. i whisper to her, she smiles “alright” she responds, im holding her hand tightly, we end up getting found, “are you kids okay?” the person asks, “sir he got hit really hard last night”. Olivia says, he looks at my face with shock, “thats a huge scar” he says, “what about her is she okay?”, he looks at her “seems fine, we’ll see though”, he says. all the kids gather to the food-hall, the teachers and other kids run to us, “Ethan what happened?”, mr.brent asks “i got hit with a huge piece of hail while searching for Olivia”. i say while smiling, “and i got smacked in the head with it when i woke up i was next to Ethan”, Olivia says, mr.brent gives us both hugs, “im so sorry you guys” he says, “its alright”. Olivia says, “i had my boyfriend to rescue me” Olivia says, she gives me a hug, i smile and hug her back, when i look over at Christopher hes not looking at us. “aren’t you supposed to hurt me or something Christopher?”, i ask him curiously, hes up to no good, he looks at me and shakes his head, “i like Jane” he says while blushing. me and Olivia look at each other, “they will not last long” i whisper to her, we laugh slightly, “Ethan are you okay?” my dad walks up to me, “yeah im good” i say, he looks over and smiles. “hey Olivia” he says to her, “uh hey dad” i say, he looks at me “you okay?”, he asks i smile, “i wanted to tell you s-shes my girlfriend” i say awkwardly, at that moment. Olivia leans up and kisses my cheek, she then pulls back “wow” i say caught up in a daze, in this moment the whole room bursts into cheers, and then i freeze in terror “Olivia are you okay?”. i hear, her DAD ask! oh no, if he finds out im going to be dead!, “hey dad!”. she says smiling, he smiles then looks at me, “whos that? a friend of yours?” he asks, sweat starts beading up on my forehead, “how about i show you?” she asks, then she kisses me quickly. my eyes wided, i start smiling like a massive dork, i look over and oh no, he’s looking at me, his jaw is dropped and eyes are wided, in a instant and bow down to him. “dont kill me! please im to young to die!”, i say pleading for my life i hear steps come closer to me, im almost convinced this is my final breath, i then feel a pat on my back. “take care of her” he says, i look at him in a daze, “your.. not gonna kill me?”, i ask he starts laughing, “no of course not” he says, he lifts me up, “we’re gonna take Olivia to the hospital now”. he says smiling, i then grab olivias hand, “please let me join, i wont be able to be calm if im not there for her”, i say begging him, his eyes get slightly wide. “sure” he says, we then walk to her car, we get inside of the car and buckle up, when we get inside the car Olivia’s dad turns on the radio, Nero forte starts playing, “a hope like yours wont help me now”. Olivia starts singing, a smile appears on my face, “TO MUCH ANIMOSITY..” i then continue singing, me and Olivia end up doing a duet, today was one tough day, out of everything i hope Olivia turns out okay.

ethans pov

i kick the soccerball with extreme force, sweat keeps dripping off of me im wheezing intensely, a hand is settled gently onto my shoulder “Ethan are you okay?” Olivia asks me sweetly. i smile lightly at her, “um yeah im-” as im speaking i suddenly feel a intense pain in my head, i fall to the ground grabbing my head “augh!” i yell out, Olivia crouches down to me. “Ethan whats wrong?” she asks me, “my head hurts i feel dizzy” i say in agony, “my head is spinning out of control” i say hoarsely, thats when she dose something unexpected. she holds me up and walks me to her house, she opens up the door shuts it and carries me inside, “you need to lay down, it’ll help” she says to me, she carries me to her room and sets me in her bed. i lay my head on the fluffy pillow, “why were you working out so hard?” she asks me with concernity in her voice, “Christopher beat me in a fight, i felt ashamed”. i say pathetically, she then leans down and gives me a hug, “Ethan its okay” she whispers to me, “it made me feel like a loser since i lost i thought you’ll be ashamed of me”. i say to Olivia, she stares at me with a look of confusion, she then pulls back “Ethan you worry to much” she says, i smile at her “thanks” i say to her my phone then pings. i look over at it, “ive got to leave” i say, Olivia looks at me sadly “okay” she says disappointingly, i stare into her eyes just thinking, “b-but before i go” i say shyly. i lean over, i put my hand on her cheek, the other hand rested on her shoulder and i kiss her, my face is blushing intensely my heart is pounding like a drum and my eyes are closed tight. i then pull back and open my eyes, she looks at me with a intense smile on her face, “i got to go” i say happily i then leave quickly, i dont want my mom mad. once i get inside i run to my room, i get onto my computer and look up “wikihow”, the website i go for all of my struggles and it dose really help, as im doing that a ping happens from my phone. “im happy you kissed me”, i see that text from Olivia and i start smiling, “im happy about it to” i type to her, i see those bubbles that indicate shes texting back. im anxiously waiting, “do you like me?” she types back, my heart stops from anxiety, sweat beads up on my face im thinking on how to respond to her question then she texts. “my internet is going to be shut off in a hour”she says, “my mom forgot to pay it” she also responds, im unsure of how to respond, what am i suppose to say? “Ethan take a shower”. my mom yells, i turn my phone off, gather clothes and dash down stairs, as im in the shower i start to sing, how am i going to confess to Olivia? im worried of what she’ll say. this is my first time loving someone, i know how people have dealt with it, most of the time not very well, usually they experience friend-zone or unrequited love. do i sing her a song?, do i do something sappy? like “roses are red violets are blue” kind of sap?, ive read romance books so maybe, just maybe! i can get ideas from some of them. maybe “the probability of love at first sight” will help!, i find that book really relateable, ive asked some of my friends like Steve and stuff, he says he relates, so that’ll be a good start. i mean Olivia loves my guitar playing, maybe she’ll love that!, i know she loves sappy, cheesy romantic things like that, shes said so herself, what song should i sing?. im not a expert with these things, do i write a letter?, asking my older brother or older sister is a no go, they’ll tease me “ooo Ethan loves some girl” they will be screaming that around the house. i have a journal i personally write in, no one knows of it though, once i get upstairs i dash towards my phone, i grab it quickly, my eyes wided once i notice the time. approximately a minute after, “dang it!” i yell infuriated, i could’ve made it on time, but me being the total baka i am missed it!, i walk over to my window sill. i open it up, getting hit in the face with a nightly breeze, “hey Ethan” Olivia says totally confident, “u-um about earlier” i say anxiously, my heart is beating so much it feels like im going to die. she looks at me, blushing intensely i can tell shes anxious to, “Je t’aime” i say blushing intensely, sweat beads up on my forehead, i start laughing lightly due to nervousness. she looks at me surprised, her eyes then wided and she starts smiling, “i knew it!” she yells due to happiness loudly, i start easing up into a smile “will you-“. she then cuts me off, it isn’t what i wanted to hear, nor would have expected, at least not at this moment, “you like that band?” she asks me excitedly, i look down at my shirt. “uh yeah i do” i say, my hand is awkwardly placed around my neck, looks like asking her to be my girlfriend is out of the question, “what were you asking earlier?” she asks curiously. blush spreads across my face, “i-i was gonna ask if you wanted to listen to slipknots new album”, i say nervously, she tilts her head “ive never heard them, let me take a listen”. she says curiously, i get up and get the album, i put it into my cd player, we end up listening and jamming out, shes headbanging really hard ive never seen this side of her. its really cute, “a hope likes yours wont help me now” she sings, she sounds like a angel especially when she sings those particular vocals, im sitting here just listening to her. she looks so pretty, im dazed by her beautiful looks and singing, my eyes are wided she smiles at me, “you look cute” she says to me, a smile spreads on my face, “i s-should really be saying that to you”. i stutter in a daze, why am i acting so stupid?, “its gotta be you” i say, she looks at me with a confused look, “l-let me be your boyfriend, i-i love you”. i say shyly, she looks at me as tears flood her eyes, “of course”! she says happily, “just come over here” she says smiling, our windows are close together so we can hand books to each other. i lean over, we stare into each others eyes for a moment, i cant wait any longer!, i put my hand on her cheek and press my lips against hers, my eyes close. my face is heating up a storm, i cant her out of my head, i knew she was the one for me, shes my forever as of now, a tear manages to slip out of my eye, i then remove my lips off of hers. we stare into each others eyes, tears are falling out of my eyes, “are you okay?” she asks me curiously, i smile “as long as you love me, im fine” i say. tears continue to fall, “im happy because ive loved you for months, im so happy you’re my girl now”, i say with the biggest, dork smile you have seen, she smiles at me “you dork”. she says punching my arm lightly, i wipe my tears away, we end up talking for what seems like hours, eventually she says shes going to bed, “alright but first” i say quickly. i then give her a kiss, “goodnight baby” i say blushing awkwardly, how on earth can people say that without blushing?, Olivia blushes at me and smiles, “alright handsome goodnight”. she says, then she closes her window, i close my window as well and hit the hay, im laying in bed as my heart beats rapidly, im blushing so hard it burns my face. tomorrows gonna be a good day of school, ill be going back with a girlfriend, a amazing girlfriend, shes my first girlfriend, im her first boyfriend, i hope i do a good job ive never dated before. i hope im not bad at it, being a boke is the least of what i want, my eyes then drift into a peaceful, wonderful slumber, as im falling into this slumber i think of Olivia. it was a interesting day, tomorrows going to be even better, if word of this gets around to Christopher oh man, i cant even image what that crazy psycho would do, he would crush me to a absolute pulp!.

i watched the first three seasons of the office, it was great i am currently watching season four, ive also been doing other things like missing my crush and such, i know this was short but i really did nothing much.

a fist rams into my face, the pain dwells up, the power from that attack ends up making me crash into the soil ground, the taste of nasty bitter grass spreads in my mouth along with the aroma. a strong force comes clashing down heinously onto my back, the pain from the extreme force ends up making me grunt, pain is harshly in my voice, a snicker is unleashed. the snicker of my rival is released into the quiet air, i feel his cold eyes stare at me, “how is the dirt tasting down there goth boy?” he asks me while suppressing the urge to kick me. i snicker, “how is the stupidity up there je-” the comment is quickly put to a halt, he dose this by giving me one singular kick, i suppress the urge to cry, i hide the fact i want to scream. this is dumb, this isn’t.. what Olivia would want, i grab a rock by my face and launch it towards him, “heh.. standing up for yourself goth boy?” he asks me coldly. nows my time to strike, i do a twist therefore my back is rested on the ground, i reach my leg up quickly, with force and kick him between the legs, “AUGH!!” he yells out. he falls onto the ground, rolling on the ground while suppressing some urge of his, i get up and bring my fist crashing down, my fist rams into his face, causing him to cry out for help. he started something, so im gonna end this “something”, as im painfully smashing my fist into his face he grabs my arm, he twists it in a certain direction, “ow!” i yelp out. i grip my arm tightly, i however fell into his little trap, he raises his fist and rams it into my right eye, i end up slamming into the ground from the strong impact, hes trying to hit me more. i keep on blocking, “OLIVIA WOULD BE ASHAMED IF SHE SAW HOW PATHETIC YOU ARE!” he yells into my face while snickering heinously at me, from that remark i ended up going berserk. i punch him hard in the face, he fly’s off from the impact, i then get up quickly and stomp my leg quickly, and painfully onto his stomach, “AUGH!” he yells. it hurts so bad he turns to his side, he ends up spewing chunks all over the ground, once hes done he looks at me, “LISTEN YOU LITTLE PUNK YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!!”. i shout at him enraged, he looks at me with fear in his eyes, he then ends up bursting into tears, he yells “im sorry, im sorry” at me, i dont say “thanks” i just end up walking away. hes surprisingly strong, it makes me feel bad that i just endorsed it instead of fighting back, now im sitting on a bench thinking of what just happened, “Ethan what happened?”. mr.brent asks me, “i accepted chirstophers challenged to fight, he got me pretty good” i say, mr.brent stares at me not saying a word, “i-im getting mr.scott”. he says quietly, he then leaves he was so shocked he didn’t know what to say, after hes long gone i feel a pat on my back, i look over and see Jane “man you’re a loser” she says. i give her a glance, i then sigh “well tell me what would you have done then?” i ask her, she looks gawkily at me then she walks away, “if you are mister tough guy, go teach Christopher a lesson”. she says, im so overcome with anger that.. i stupidly do it, is it stupid? im.. not sure, i dash towards Christopher and smash my fist into his face, i pack several punches into his face. then i kick him, but then im abruptly stopped, a arm toughly grips my arm, im then pulled away by mr.scott into his office, “WHAT WAS THAT?”. mr.scott yells at me, i look down at my hands guilty, “he uh.. started it” i say awkwardly, “I KNOW BUT WHY DID YOU DO IT A-G-A-I-N?!” he yells loudly at me, “Jane said.. Olivia would be ashamed”. i say quietly, mr.scott stares at me blankly, “just get into the waiting area, you’re heading home” he says, “so um.. expulsion?” i ask, “yes ill also have to talk to your parents”. mr.scott says, “you seriously need anger management, why do you keep doing things of t.. THIS CULTURE THINGS DUE TO ANGER? LIKE BULLYING, FIGHTING HUH? WHY?”. he practically screams that at me, “if this happens more then five times, we’ll have to expel you, luckily your toxicness isn’t kicking in-” i then slam on the desk. the door then opens up, “Ethan! sit down now” my dad commands me, i obey and sit, “hello Mr.. er you, you seriously have to get him into therapy just something” the principal says. my mom grabs my arm, “come on Ethan lets go” she says in a ticked off tone, once we’re in the car she pops the question, “did you keep fighting that guy because of what they girl said?”. my mom asks, i nod my head “sorry” i say, “no its fine, i understand but lets give therapy a try” she says, once we get home i head to my room, i shut the door and open the window, “Olivia? you there?” i ask, i then see her open up the window “Ethan what happened to your eye?”. she asks, i take a deep breathe and explain it to her, “never listen to Jane, im proud of you no matter what” she tells me, “Je t’aime” i say happily, she smiles “i still dont what it means but thanks”. she says, “now my moms scheduling a therapist for me” i say. “maybe its not that bad, i have one” she says, “how come?” i ask curiously, “anxiety stuff like that” she says, i smile hours end up passing. before i know it, im laying in bed fast asleep, i tasted dirt very bitter by the way, tasted grass and got absolutely destroyed, how on earth did he destroy me? i thought i was pretty strong. i need to work out more, especially for her Olivia, she makes me so happy, she makes my life so much better, ever since that one day ive been singing her asleep. i love doing it, she look at me with this glint in her eyes, when im with her i feel as if we’re the only humans left, my heart pounds when im near her, i also read those books she gave me. i really liked them, they were cute, incredibly relateable, she has also been asking me to sing to her, ive sung her some of my favorite songs, she loves my singing. she always says how its handsome, ive also been playing soccer with her, im not sure how school is gonna work out, you know with me and Christopher, i really love Olivia i dont know how she feels. i plan on confessing to her, im going to tell her how i feel on the Christmas trip, when i wake up the sun blasts in my face, i get up quickly and shut my blinds. then i hurry down stairs, i carry my speaker in one hand and in the other i carry some cds, i get into the basement and lock it, then i start working out with my shirt tossed onto the floor. i keep working out until my body feels like its gonna snap, even then i keep working out, sweat is beading on my forehead and sweat drips off of me, i now lay on the floor. i start doing push ups, “Ethan?” my mom asks, i look up and see her standing on the stairs, “oh hey! just working out” i say, my mom looks gawkily at me “how come so suddenly?”. she ask me, “i mean its 6:00” she says puzzled, “Christopher beat me, made me look like a loser” i say, she walks down more, “when you lose a fight you stay in your room”. she says, “are you doing this because of a girl you like?”, my mom asks me curiously, i nod “yeah, i looked like a loser.. if im gonna date her i have to get strong to protect her”. i say, im now doing push ups on one finger, “augh crud!” i yell, my finger slips and i smack my nose on the cold stone floor, “Ethan! are you okay?” my mom asks while running to me. i get up, blood drips out of my nose, i wipe it away “yeah im alright” i say, i then get on the floor and repeat what i was doing, “Ethan.. seriously take it easy”. she says patting my back, i shake my head “no, i cant” i say my breathing is getting hoarse and weak, “come on Ethan, please do something else” she says, i nod so i go outside and play soccer.

hello! i am vladimir alaric, and every friday i will do drama talk where i talk or rant about whatever i guess!

today’s topic: love hate relationships

you see, i dont actually know if “love hate relationships” or “love dislike relationships” are a real thing, nor do i know if anyone else struggles with this, i like this girl but im dealing with something. i want to be her friend, and more of course but at the same time i dont, i unfriended her yet i want her back but also dont, what is this confusing feeling? dose anyone else deal with this?. if you guys have dealt with this, comment down below! feedback would be greatly appreciated! ” a relationship in which your feelings about someone or something often  change between love and hate ” is what Macmillan dictionary.com says. i dont hate her, nor do i dislike her, its more like this i love her and dont want to leave her, but then when i try staying with her i change my mind and realize i dont. its very possible this is a side of my toxic side showing, or maybe my verbally abusive side showing, im not sure or it could be my seasonal depression i get around winter/Christmas. i suffer with her but i suffer without her, what is that? i dont get it, if you guys know what it is please tell me that would be greatly appreciated thank you for listening! toon in next week!